Many are excited to see Robert Rodriguez’s “mock trailer inside a real movie” adaptation. After the GRIND HOUSE feature entertained audiences in theaters, the mock trailers to appear before the film were a hot topic for quite some time. They mixed shock and humor quite seamlessly, leaving most viewers hungry for more. Well, those people are going to get their chance to get a taste of some more, as Rodriguez has adapted the trailer for MACHETE into a feature-length film.

The film is going to bring back MACHETE himself, Danny Trejo, along with more big-name actors and actresses. The names you can expect to find in MACHETE’s credits include Steven Seagal, Jeff Fahey, Robert De Niro, Michelle Rodriguez, Cheech Marin, Lindsay Lohan, and the more-than-average looking Jessica Alba. One of those folks in the cast has already been granted their first character poster for the film.

This poster was spotted at the American Film Market by the folks over at Coming Soon. The poster features a curvy Alba as an ICE agent that is as sexy as she is deadly. This movie will have it all: guns, grit, guts, double-crossing, revenge, good-looking gals.

Unfortunately, this poster is a poor reflection of that. It’s a classic example of how bland character posters have become. All we have here is Alba holding a hand gun and giving the classic ZOOLANDER “Blue Steel” look. Hopefully it won’t be too long till we get a MACHETE poster featuring, well, Machete.