Rating: 4/10

Writers: Roland Emmerich, Harald Kloser
Director: Roland Emmerich
Cast: John Cusack, Amanda Peet, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Thandie Newton, Oliver Platt, Danny Glover, Woody Harrelson
Studio: Columbia Pictures

2012 tells the story of the world’s ultimate demise on December 21, 2012, as the ancient Mayans foretold of thousands of years ago. As the planets align, the Earth's plates shift, causing earthquakes and volcanic eruptions across the globe, followed by titan tidal waves, which ultimately turns our planet into the galaxy’s kiddie pool. Spoiler alert…there’s a little death and destruction.

Leading up to this fateful date, a single scientist (Chiwetel Ejiofor, CHILDREN OF MEN) fights against the clock in hopes that something can be done to prevent humanity’s complete extinction. All the while, author/limo driver Jackson Curtis (John Cusack, CON AIR) fights to uphold his image as a good father to his children and a friend to his ex-wife (Amanda Peet).

Yet, when the inevitable finally occurs, millions of lives are instantaneously taken, cities are leveled in minutes, and the few survivors have nothing left but the will to do whatever it takes to survive. It’s the end of the world as they know it, and nobody feels fine.

And neither does the audience when the film asks for a little bit too much of our patience and understanding. Clocking in at 158 minutes, 2012 repeats its formulaic “edge-of-your-seat” moments, in which the same characters repeatedly and barely escape death one too many times, making what is already an unbelievable plot all the more so. So much so, in fact, that the film begins to feel CRASH-like in its scenes of million-to-one odds and the even slimmer chanced fact that everyone seems to be somehow connected. In short, it's more probable for hell to freeze over. But I guess Emmerich has already made that film as well.

Where Emmerich ultimately went wrong was casting actors in the film. While 2012 does have a great cast, made up of actors that bring forth a “what the hell is he/she doing in this” response, they are misused in a silly, overdramatic plot with a forced commentary on humanity and survival. In all honesty, the best moments of 2012 are when things are getting destroyed in a scope that has not yet been seen on film.

Unfortunately, when it comes to Emmerich, this is all we have essentially seen on film - DAY AFTER TOMORROW, INDEPENDENCE DAY, GODZILLA, and more. The man seems to have a glacial-sized hard-on that erupts like a volcano at the idea of the world, either in part or whole, being eradicated. Each time he pushes his agenda more and more, whatever it may be, causing the audience to be less and less taken by storm.

With 2012, Emmerich repeats himself, his formula and his forced message yet again, bringing new meaning to the phrase “disaster movie.”