IRON MAN team to write TOMB RAIDER reboot

Sean Hunter

by: Sean Hunter
May 5th, 2011

Tomb Raider

Man, I am so excited that it's 1996, and with the new millennium just around the corner, I can't think of a better Sony PlayStation game to adapt than Tomb Raider! Tomb Raider has the best graphics of any game since Tony Hawk's Pro Skaterand contains 100% more pixelated boobage. But who could possibly write the film adaptation of this popular game? Why, the duo behind such scripts as IRON MAN and CHILDREN OF MEN, of course, two fantastic films that haven't even been made yet!

Wait...what's going on here? It's actually 2011 and we're still talking about Tomb Raider as if it's still relavent? Okay.

Deadline is reporting that Mark Fergus and Hawk Ostby have signed on to write a reboot of the TOMB RAIDER film franchise, which is now owned by GK Films. Fergus and Ostby have previously penned IRON MAN, CHILDREN OF MEN, and this summer's COWBOYS & ALIENS. In addition, The Hollywood Reporter confirmed that this reboot will be an origin story.

A couple points of interest: Fergus and Ostby should combine names so I can call them "Hawk Fergus" (which is basically the best pretend G.I. JOE name ever). Angelina Jolie will probably not reprise her role as Laura Croft since she has a million babies and it wouldn't make sense for her to play a young version of the character. Finally, TOMB RAIDER ORIGINS: LARA CROFT sounds like the most irrelevant film idea since I tried shopping around my script for CRYSTAL PEPSI starring the Domino's Pizza "Avoid The Noid" character.

But hey, there's a market for everything.

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